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August 01, 2005
The Color Purple
<-- Check out that picture right there (click to enlarge). Do not adjust your monitor colors. You ARE seeing the color purple. No, that is not Donny Osmond as a toddler. No, that is not Peter Allen as a toddler. It's not even Rip Taylor. It is yours truly!
Now I'm no expert on toddler dressing but I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that purple probably wasn't a popular choice for 2 years old in 1973. Maybe I'm wrong though.
It's now apparent that I was primed from my earliest stages of life to be somewhat different. And I kinda like that. It's a good picture too.
Anyway, I'm learning I'm not a very good uncle. My sister has 3 kids and they are all so beautiful and bright and well-behaved. My sister is an amazing mother. It's funny that she and I are even related because we are so very different. We even look different. She is very attractive and was always the homecoming/prom queen in high school. I was always her "little brother." She still takes wonderful care of herself and looks great.
Her latest addition turns one year old tomorrow. It always ends up costing me double what a present should cost because I have to have it overnighted because I always forget about it. I'm not so good with dates.
I remember when she told me she was pregnant with this "surprise" one, I thought to myself, quite selfishly, I can't afford another one, please use protection. "Congratulations, though!"
Whenever her kids have birthdays I ask my sister what they want. She tells me what to get them and I do. I think she does this cuz she wants them to hate me. Every gift she makes me get them they never like.
She always makes me get them "educational" gifts. One year for my oldest nephew she suggested I get him the Harry Potter book series because "he loves them and loves to read." So I did. The next Christmas I asked my nephew if he liked Harry Potter. He said, "No, I hate him. He's boring." Thanks, Sis, another strike against Uncle TJ Durban!
This past X-mas, we went to Colorado to visit her family (Rob and I alternate between families every X-mas). This year was my turn. Great. My sister said that my nephew and niece are learning math puzzles and fractions and LOVE them. She directs me to a new educational game "they will love." Okay, I thought to myself, I WILL get this for them since they LOVE it so much.
Keep in mind, my nephew has just opened a bunch of PlayStation games and my niece has opened a bunch of Barbie doll presents. They start to unwrap my cool math fraction game. They both look at it bewildered and toss it aside. My sister says, "Say thank you to your uncles." My sister always forced me to add Rob into the "uncle" mix. I always loved that cuz it made her look progressive and also made me not take all of the blame for crappy presents. They oblige, throw it down and move on to the next cool present my sister never told me to get them. Thank god my mom was serving potent mimosas.
From now on, I will get them what I want. Something purple, perhaps.
Posted by durban bud at August 1, 2005 03:18 PM
Comments
God no! Do you want them to turn into lesbians or worse drag queens? Go with green, it's very soothing and one size fits all :) Every kid (including this one) looooooooooves cash. Play along with your sister's fantasy of making everything "educational" (her way of trying ensure that they end up in college and off the 6:00 o'clock news, you can't fault her for that). Givem greenbacks and then tell your sister it is for them to learn to manage their money... (plus it only requires a card and a stamp!)
And you know she's the one who was most likely reading the Harry Potter books :-P (tho I don't blame her!)
Posted by: TOS at August 1, 2005 04:54 PM
You look like DJ Conner (of Roseanne fame.) Cute.
...
Great post. I have similar xmases w/ my sister and her kids...I've learned to give money. My sister has already bought the gifts they wanted to fulfill her own list for them. Though they're never thrilled (money is the expected gift at this point) ULTIMATELY they appreciate having money when they find something they want. (I fell for that learning tool thing too...the something-Frog or Frog-something...they hated it. Went in my sister's annual yard sale six months later. Ugh!)
Posted by: Ken at August 1, 2005 07:51 PM
You are just too cute in that pic. Perhaps you should wear purple more often. :)
As for gifts for nephews or nieces -- and I have 5 in all -- I NEVER listen to their parents. Hell, I never even ask their parents. I get the kids whatever I think they might like or I send Toys-R-Us gift cards. The gift cards (in my humble, non-child-having opinion) are better than cash for little kids cause it means the kids pick out their own presents and Mom and/or Dad can't make them "save" it like with cash. Sometimes, we also like to give sporting equipment: Hannah, at age 3, got this awesome little golf set and she was so cute playing. Granted these sporting gifts have a string attached - if they ever make the majors, we expect them to remember who got them started. ;)
Posted by: stina at August 2, 2005 12:37 PM
hey, TJ! i didn't know you had a blog.
btw, don't be hard on yourself. you're a good uncle...the fact that you even get your nephews gifts is cool.
i have somewhere in the neighborhood of 65 nephews and nieces (from my 12 siblings), and i never get them shit. i have a hard time even remembering their names.
Posted by: Joe Riddle at August 2, 2005 03:48 PM
LOL I just saw his Joe Riddle's comment on my site and viewed his blogger profile which mentions that he doesn't believe in the red/blue state theory - he thinks they are purple! But it seems he beat me to it!
Posted by: TOS at August 2, 2005 04:06 PM
I haven't seen this photo in a long, long time!!!!
I can't help but think that perhaps it's Karma that reminds you of your sister's kids, and that it has stopped by for a visit to Uncle TJ ;)
I seem to recall a certain home video as TJ in the leading role capturing the reaction of getting socks as a Christmas gift from your Uncle G. Fucking hilarious!!!!
Those kids love you........you know that right.
You're the cool man that let's them be themselves when you're around. What kid wouldn't love that!!!
Keepin it real.....
Posted by: pam at August 2, 2005 08:57 PM