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January 05, 2006
Trash
* So my mom was asking me for some ideas for christmas gifts this year, I told her we needed a large trash can. She asked me to send her a link to one that I liked. I told her I would check to see what Target had and get back to her. Well, I forgot; my mom didn't. She called and emailed me that she needed to know which one to order ASAP cuz she was going out of town. She leaves a message on the answering machine, "T, I need to know now!" She always calls me "T" and for some reason she seems to shout it. When she's upset with me, it's like a jet taking off (only in a southern accent). "Teeeeeeeeeee!" I've gotten used to it.
Anyway, I immediately send her a link to a large trash can from Target. In my haste to choose something, I have ordered a Touch-Free Trash Can. I did not realize it came with this feature. This, my friends, is the epitome of laziness. She orders it. She bought a Roomba for me last christmas (which I DID NOT ask for but have takin' a liking to) and now a touch-free trash can. She must really think I'm lazy.
It arrives via UPS. The trash can is nice and definitely holds a shitload of garbage which we seem to accumulate a ton of. I'm not sure how this happens. There are only two of us so I don't know where it all comes from.
Anyway, you hold your hand in front of it and it opens (and makes a little noise). After, a few seconds, it closes. It's very Oscar the Grouch. This sounds all nice and everything but....the problem is everytime you walk by it, it opens, as if to say, "Perhaps you need to throw yourself out or, at least, that shirt you bought from Universal Gear two years ago."
We had a small get-together a couple weeks ago. One of our friends was standing in front of the can with his back towards it while he was having a conversation with someone. A bunch of us were viewing this spectacle from afar because the can kept opening and closing during their whole conversation. It was as if the trash can was having a conversation with his ass. It was hysterical.
Can't wait to see what Mom gets me next year.
* Gene Shalit needs to retire and then shave. If you did not like "Brokeback Mountain," that's fine, but his review I saw this morning smacked of homophobia. He suggested Jack was a sexual predator. Huh? Cuz he loved a guy who he knew loved him back but just couldn't show it the same way? He wasn't predatory at all. I guess when a man pursues a woman in a film (ya know, by sending her postcards and suggesting they can share a life together) he should be labeled a sexual predator. Mr. Shalit, I hope you get warts.
* Letterman was brilliant with Bill O'Rielly the other day. I was actually watching it when Letterman went off on him. I've never seen him do that before. Good for him. Go here to watch it.
* I need to make some changes to this site I think. Not sure what to do. Did anyone upgrade to Moveable Type 3.2 yet? Is it worth the upgrade?
* Be good.
Posted by durban bud at January 5, 2006 12:12 PM
Comments
That trash can is possessed and evil!!! We need an exorcism and pronto! I swear it tried to attack me at our holiday gathering... It kept flipping its lid, making noises and chomping away like a cracked out queen would at Nation on a Saturday night...
Roomba on the other hand has been very cordial... I like him.
Gene is nothing but a 2-bit has-been crank... Would somebody please tell him that Groucho Marx imitations went out 40 years ago?
Posted by: TOS at January 5, 2006 06:03 PM
Teeeeee----my partner and I have the same trash can---he's a techie nerd and loves shit like that--I myself was freaked out by the trash can for about a month-now I think it's the greatest--especially when you are cooking and need to toss something in without gettin your hands near the trash---damn come to think of it I have gotten lazy--oh yeah we have the roomba too--what next--i'm sure he's(my bf) is eyeing some new product to make us even lazier as I sit here typing this on my wireless laptop, watching TV, as roomba cleans the floor---Damn if I could just teach that thing to bring me something to drink--heheee--anyways man---love the blog keep it up!
Posted by: tod at January 5, 2006 06:23 PM
RE: changes on the site - the new thumbnail of your hot mug is a good start. Next stop: TJ wallpaper background action shots.
Posted by: jimbo at January 6, 2006 01:26 PM
Hey....i'm back
I want you to play on MYSPACE as well.
it's a fun site......
anyway....glad to be back, and David Letterman was great with what he said.
bye for now.....
kisses....
Posted by: Pam at January 9, 2006 01:11 PM