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August 03, 2006

The End Of The World

My sister thinks the end of the world is coming very soon. She reiterated this point to me last night on the phone. She's been saying this for the past 10 years. And I hear about it at least 3 times a year.

I keep telling her that times have been worse; we just never heard about it cuz there were no TV's or radio or Internet or cable channels hundreds of years ago constantly feeding us bad news; plus, we weren't alive then. She always says, "I just have a feeling about this, I can feel it." And then she adds, "I just want us all to be together in the afterlife." Huh? Why wouldn't we be? I know I'm a horny heathen from homo heights, but why can't I come? I love my sister, but sometimes I don't get her logic.

I always want to ask her what we'll do in the afterlife, cuz if we have to hold hands and sing "Crown Him the King of Kings" everyday, I think I'd rather take the elevator to the lower level, thank you very much.

I think the topic came up cuz we were talking about global warming. She said her mega-church near Colorado Springs has been preaching a lot about the end of times. I'm like, "Don't they preach about being a good person in the here and now." "Sometimes," she says. Ugh. She then started talking about the middle east and something about wars and seven years of destruction and that being a sign or prophecy as foretold in the bible of something or something. As she was giving me a litany of "signs", I became distracted by a werewolf/man on TV.

ABC News was doing a "special report" on medical oddities. Apparently, this guy has a condition in which he grows an abnormally large amount of hair all over his body. Here's the disturbing part, I wasn't repulsed by him. In fact, if I was at a bar at 2:00 AM and my choices were between, say Lance Bass and the Wolfman, I would totally bang the Wolfman. It would be a more unique experience, plus it would be fun to make him howl.

Anyway, my sister finally regained my attention when I heard her utter something about the anti-christ.

I'm like, "Huh?"

"I think the anti-christ is coming."

"It's already here. It's on Headline News. And its name is Nancy Grace."

"No, that's not it."

"Is it David Hasselhoff?"

"No, I'm serious."

"So am I. Have you heard him sing? Tubular Bells comes out of that guy."

"It's not him. We don't know who it is yet."

"Okay, well when you do know, could you please call me, sugar tits?"

"Huh?"

"Nevermind."

Good article: The Dinosaurs Roam the Earth

Posted by durban bud at August 3, 2006 02:17 AM

Comments

Something is just wrong about calling your sis sugar tits... even if the high altitude is finally getting to her ;-)

But seriously - things in the world are very very disturbing. I'm having a harder time than usual digesting all this violence, murder, unrest etc. But a thought struck me the other day...

Isn't it odd that now that we are stuck in the height of FUNDAMENTALISM (Christianity, Islam etc) it is HOTTER, more violent and miserable in the world? Seriously. All these people profess their love for God and their faith yet are making this world a lousy place to live.

Call me crazy but having studied about 4 major world religions - peace, respect, love and non-violence are all the penultimate tenets in each religion.

If the world is ending, it's these fundamentalists who are making it happen...

Posted by: TOS at August 3, 2006 09:29 AM

Every time I go to the Rite Aid on 7th and S, NW (just up the street from the Shaw/Howard Metro station) someone has to tell me the end of the world is coming. So I call it the 'Armageddon Rite Aid'.

I agree with TOS, it's the religious kooks who are PLANNING on the end of days to happen.

Posted by: jimbo at August 3, 2006 11:28 AM

When I was in high school in the late s@e#v&e*n^t$i%e(s I was told by a fundamentalist aquaintance that the end of the world was near. The signs in those days were bar codes, laser scanners and the trouble in the Middle East.

Not much has changed...except now the fundamentalists run the country.

Posted by: rodger at August 4, 2006 06:55 PM

My mom grew up in the 1930's and 40's. This was right when Adolph Hitler was at the peak of his power. She says there were a few crazies with signs saying the end of the world is near. Well, we survived then and we'll survive now. But I do have my fingers crossed.

Posted by: Brendan at August 5, 2006 12:44 PM

I think the werewolf is kind of cute too. He gives me proof that the world is not ending just evolving away from the evil known as Manscraping!

Posted by: Steve at August 5, 2006 05:11 PM

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