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September 16, 2007
I Could Just Kill A Man
And I blame Jodie Foster. We sat through the dreadful mess known as The Brave One. I heard her on various talk shows say she was very proud of this film. I thought she was serious, so I made plans to see it. In hindsight, I'm guessing she is proud of this film, like she is proud of her homosexuality. Ba-da-boom!
I enjoy Jodie Foster (Candleshoe, anyone?) and Neil Jordan (The Crying Game -- which I saw way before everyone knew the secret, and I was well surprised!), but I'm not sure what led them to think this would make a good movie. Sure, it was great to see her blow away the bad guys, but we shouldn't have been laughing at key elements in the film.
Sill, it piqued an interest in owning a dildo-shaped gun and ridding the community of self-righteous trolls and bitterbears. I would make a great vigilante.
So I took that rage to Nellie's later in the evening. It was my first time there. Luckily my friends hadn't seen the film, so they mellowed out my angerbuzz. It was a pleasant enough place, especially the rooftop deck.
While there, a friend tipped me off to a game called, "Can you spot the steroid user?" Apparently 'roids are making a huge comeback this season. He pointed out a few. There are clear signs I'm told: huge body mass gain within a couple weeks, protruding hard bellies, thick necks -- but the clearest sign takes place a couple months from now when they go bat-shit crazy, albeit with fierce muscles and tiny testes.
Here's hoping they avoid The Brave One when it's available on DVD in a couple months, or all hell's gonna break loose.
UPDATE: This clip of cute little pant-suit Jodie is way better than Brave One Jodie, and it's free to watch and more realistic! Thanks, Jeremy.
Posted by durban bud at September 16, 2007 06:13 PM
Comments
Darn, I generally enjoy Jodie's movies.
Posted by: Robguy at September 16, 2007 08:23 PM
I saw that movie today too - holy shit, violence anyone. Left the theatre shaking. On a good note - Terrance Howard is a hottie!
Posted by: Mumping at September 16, 2007 11:15 PM
I only enjoy Jodie Foster like this.
Posted by: jeremy at September 17, 2007 03:31 AM
The sarge does not condone the use of steroids except for medicinal purposes. However, I think there were several folks within the deck 'region' that fit your description. As for me, I'm powered by cake icing,chips and dip! (maybe that's why I can't fit my pants?)
Posted by: sarge at September 17, 2007 05:09 AM
Jodi's gay? Huh, go figure.
Posted by: atari_age at September 17, 2007 06:34 AM
I loved it, but then again, I've been really wanting to taser bad people lately. The partner didn't care for it as much...perhaps his meds are working better than mine.
Posted by: stebbins at September 17, 2007 10:39 AM
I echo sarge. I get the results you describe (except the tiny testes) by combining my diet and (lack of an) exercise regimen with too much time spent with crazy people.
Too bad about Jodie, though.
Posted by: Huntington at September 17, 2007 01:52 PM
You clever little photoshopper, you. Having an incredibly quirky movie sense, I generally look at IMDB, Rottentomatoes and Netflix comments before I see a movie. When I came across a comment that said, "the scene in the beginning is so gratuitous and violent that I started to cry and cover my eyes", I thought, "hmm. This one may not be for me". I'll take your word for it that it's bad. Although I see that people either love it or hate it...
Posted by: raybob at September 17, 2007 02:12 PM
Watching Jodie Foster pretend to be in love with a man is as disconcerting as watching Ellen Degeneres pretend to be in love with a man in Mr. Wrong. It just distracting and weird. She did seem way more into Lenny Kravitz's daughter in the back on that car. She should embrace her lezzienes and roll with it.
Posted by: Dennis at September 17, 2007 03:40 PM
I remember having a crush about as strong as a gay boy could have on her along about the time she made that video. Thanks Jeremy!
Posted by: Dan at September 18, 2007 01:57 AM
I LOVE Candleshoe! That was back when she looked like a little man tate.
Posted by: cb at September 18, 2007 10:48 AM