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November 13, 2007
The Millennials
Millennials are taking over the work force and they're even more incorrigible than Gen-Xers, if that's even possible.
Gen-Xers are largely responsible for creating the "40 is the new 30" phenomenon that is sweeping the nation. We're more laidback; we're educated; we don't rush into marriage; we don't feel pressure to procreate; we age better; we're more sensitive to others (thank you, Kurdt); we're politically, socially and environmentally responsible; we're willing to enter into therapy; we wear witty t-shirts; and we created casual Friday. So show us some goddamn respect.
Millennials are growing up even later in life. They live at home longer; communicate only through text and instant messages, cell phones, online social networks and blogs; develop life skills through video games; and they write articles to emasculate their elders.
Rapid advances in technology during their formative years are mostly to blame for their selfishness, as well as sensitive parenting, but the primary cause is likely due to the absence of multiple Emmy-award-winning actress Patricia Wettig in their lives.
For most red-blooded American teenage boys, watching thirtysomething was a rite of passage in the late '80's. We always imagined dining with Patricia (Patty) at a quaint, upscale cafe in Philadelphia -- perhaps sharing a cranberry scone and a hot plunger pot of hazelnut coffee -- as we discussed our relationship problems and feelings.
Sure, some teenage boys preferred the raspy-voiced, spunky Polly Draper as their BFF, but Patricia was the one we all trusted to tuck us into bed, adjust the netting on our lacrosse sticks, and share our most intimate secrets with (like the tingly sensation Ken Olin gave us in our groin).
Sadly, Millennials never got to experience the raw emotional brilliance and tell-it-like-it-really-is honesty of a Patricia Wettig. If they had, they would have greater compassion and respect for those of us in our thirties and beyond. And I'm sorry, but Moesha was no Patricia Wettig.
Rent thirtysomething on DVD, Millennials. Watch and learn. Respek.
Posted by durban bud at November 13, 2007 10:07 PM
Comments
Though, after re-acquainting myself with the definition of GenEx, I may not qualify as one. So basically popular culture has deceived me all these years with this label. Hmm. Regardless, show me some goddamn respek.
Posted by: durban bud at November 13, 2007 10:13 PM
And still the article yammers on and on and on and on about the sacred practices of the Baby Boomers which we Gen-Xs have had to hear about since the day we were fucking born (please, no more 60's 'classics' OK). I can deal with Millennials, it's the whiny overspending Baby Boomers I am long since over with. Gen-X has dealt with the clean-up of Baby Boomer party debt (Reagan, Bush I & II) since we got into the workplace. Yeah, respek because we'll be cleaning out your bedpans soon enough.
Posted by: jimbo at November 13, 2007 10:52 PM
Trapped between GenX and the Millenials, I find both groups incredibly annoying, or the potential to be. Still neither can be as annoying those self-indulgent, full of themselves baby boomers sucking the life out of every govt program there is. We may have to cull them, a la Logan's Run, when they become too much of a burden.
Posted by: copperred at November 13, 2007 11:43 PM
I work with several Millenials and they are difficult. They lack the basic communication skills necessary for face to face interaction and often cannot write a complete sentence. They have a hard accepting that they might be wrong about anything and have very little regard for the experience or expertise of others. The narcissism of this group is unbelievable!
All you have to do is watch “My Super Sweet 16” on MTV to see that it is going to get worse.
Posted by: Chris at November 14, 2007 08:52 AM
Um, can i be 38 and a 'millenial'? I never watched 30-something.
Posted by: cb at November 14, 2007 10:03 AM
Oh, that's where I've seen her before! She's on Brothers & Sisters now... which is a fantastic show.
Posted by: chrisb at November 14, 2007 10:22 AM
I just got back from visiting my father in his “Active Adult” gated senior citizen community in Central Florida and believe me, you haven’t seen greed until you have seen the “Greatest Generation” in line at an all-you-can-eat buffet.
Oh and never call Social Security “Senior Welfare” if you expect to stay in the will.
Posted by: Boomer Herb at November 14, 2007 12:15 PM
All these "generations" seem like foreign tribes to me. Never felt part of any group, really. But one thing is certain. Whatever group you're technically part of, that group will, without fail, start to "Flibbity floo!" the generations younger than them.
"Kids these days, they have it easy. Flibbity floo! In MY day, we did have all this fancy interwebs and hootoob claptrap thigamagigs. All WE had were TRS-80 Model I's and TI99-4A's and had to code our own games by hand in binary code using punch cards we made from used wacky-packages and star wars trading sets. And don't get me started on Yu-Gi-Oh!"
Posted by: atari_age at November 14, 2007 02:30 PM
I used to LOVE hairy Ken Olin and the rest of the cast on "Thirty Something". It was a great show. "Felicity" on the WB network struck a similar chord with me.
Posted by: brettcajun at November 14, 2007 03:36 PM
auuwww. i miss plunger pots of hazelnut with you. don't you?
Posted by: pam at November 14, 2007 04:09 PM
I work with a lot of Millenials and they can be very difficult to handle. I sat there watching "60 Minutes" with a realisation that this is the essence of the office politics.
But as a 'tweener I find myself feeling I need a Thirtysomething moment. Brettcajun is right on Ken Olin. Delish.
Posted by: Gary at November 14, 2007 04:22 PM
Me, I wanted Melanie Mayron's Melissa character to be my BFF. We'd hang out in her loft, smoke pot, listen to Lyle Lovett, discuss art, then cry and decide that men are pigs.
Posted by: Huntington at November 14, 2007 04:45 PM
So wanted Melissa as the BFF, that way could get closer to hairy Michael. Unfortunately Millenials can't get a taste of thirtysomething since it is not on DVD and probably never will be, something to do with a music rights problem.
Posted by: Adam at November 14, 2007 05:22 PM
I lean towards the Melanie Mayron camp myself.
The rest of those people used to make me scream at the TV set.
Posted by: Mark at November 14, 2007 05:44 PM
I'm sorry what was that? I was too busy watching Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends.
Posted by: Signalite at November 14, 2007 06:45 PM
Furry Ken Olin used to make me swoon! The millennials at work are, however, tiresome.
Posted by: Boomer at November 14, 2007 08:33 PM
I see reports that Millenials have no desire to work for the government and I think to myself..."Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!"
Posted by: copperred at November 14, 2007 10:16 PM
I totally swooned over Ken Olin. He was from my hometown and used to appear at ball games there ... I think he's still a DILF.
Posted by: Matt at November 14, 2007 10:56 PM
I can't say that I've noticed much difference between the various generations I work with. I generally find that the people who want to do news stories, etc. about a particular group of people have an axe to grind. 60 Minutes may just be searching for a way to fill air time. How about you? Did some twenty-something at Remington's last weekend tell you that you're too old for him? Damn young'uns!
Posted by: TED at November 15, 2007 12:25 AM
Finally someone mentioned yummy Ken Olin! Plus, remember the scene with the two men in bed together? That caused a huge stir back then (not least of which inside me, closeted college boy that I was).
Posted by: Sean at November 15, 2007 07:12 AM
I'm still mad at Thirtysomething for killing off Peter Horton's character while he was riding his bike. Oh, and Ken Olin is married to Patricia in real life I believe.
Posted by: Jason at November 15, 2007 09:10 AM
Ken Olin is a Bear now:
http://images.usatoday.com/life/_photos/2006/04/19/30something.jpg
Posted by: jimbo at November 15, 2007 12:50 PM
damn, ken olin looks worse than i do.
Posted by: Mark at November 15, 2007 01:42 PM
OMG...I LOVES me some furry man and usually like guys with facial hair...but unless Ken Olin is covering up some sort of late onset facial deformity, he needs to shave...and pronto!
Posted by: Boomer at November 15, 2007 02:01 PM
Mmmm, Ken Olin. But whatthefuck happened to him?! Shit!
I'd still love to kick it over a bottle (or four) of wine with Polly Draper & Melanie Mayron.
Redblooded American teenaged boys watched thirtysomething?
Posted by: Joe at November 15, 2007 05:04 PM
Preach it brotha!
Posted by: moby at November 16, 2007 11:34 PM
Don't worry, our overly-pampered, grotesquely self-indulgent youth will be overrun by Huns and Wisigoths shortly after my generation is incoherently slobbering over green jello in a rest home in Wilton Manors or Palm Springs.
Being born in 1960, I never felt part of any convenient marketing demo. It was the tail end of Baby Boom, and old enough to be scorned by zit-faced, self-important Gen-exers who came later.
I'm ready for my close-up Mr. Waters.
Posted by: Mike at November 17, 2007 10:24 PM
Mike -
1962 here and kinda feel in the same boat. To young to be a real boomer...too old to be GenX
Posted by: Boomer at November 18, 2007 01:09 PM
