The beach was surprisingly less crowded than in years past. Was this due to the recession and gas prices? I do believe it was. There were far fewer families there. Most gay men are immune from this, obviously. The homo quotient was still fabulously high.

The beach was littered with attractive men, sporting fauxhawks and six-pack abs. What I find odd for such a looks-obsessed community is, why would men deliberately spritz on the oil and bake themselves for hours, knowing full-well they are enhancing the aging process? I mean, your idol Madonna would never do that. I guess it comes down to our own intense needs for superficial self-gratification, however limited the desired effects last. Plus, most white men bake themselves cuz they secretly want to be Latino -- at least for the summer. Mmmm, papitos!

I took refuge under my umbrella ella ella eh eh eh. I wonder if I'll ever stop channeling Rihanna when using that word. I doubt it. I applied vigorous amounts of an SPF 30 spray all over my body. The sprays are great, but y'all need to be more careful when applying it. First off, it smells like bug spray. Secondly, it tastes like bug spray. So when you're hosing down your partner and giving everyone a li'l show, the seabreeze has a tendency to take the spritz particles you are emitting and apply them ever-so-gently to my turkey and low-fat cheese sandwich I'm eating. Please don't do that.

We put a half-tank of gas in our rented car for the trek home. A half-tank of regular gas cost $36. Ouch. I do not envy those that have to fill up often. Actually, I do not envy those with vehicles, period. Let's all ride bikes from now on, okay?

I showed off my spankin' new secretworm T-shirt, designed by the talented Sean Show. Have you purchased your own yet? They're all the rage this summer. Don't be left behind.

Here I am, lounging in my new secretworm T after an exhausting day on the beach. This is what the kids call chillaxin'.

Please note the baby fan I travel with. Isn't he adorable? His name is Mariah -- for obvious reasons. I can't sleep unless I'm getting blown by a fan.

Speaking of, I met a handsome gentleman who reads this site. He went from a reader to a Facebook friend to my BFF. We're totally gonna go on an Atlantis Cruises together, trade Body for Life recipes, and support each other as we inch closer to our Big Muscle Bears photo shoot. That's right, durban bud is the new Friendster and Bear411, all in one. Yay! He was accompanied by a hunky, hirsute hulkster who taught me how to make cream pies. Yum! Those Jersey Boys make the best batch of cream pies.

In turn, I taught them the new way we greet friends with fur in DC. It's pretty easy to do. You just rub your facial fur together, mano y mano. There is no kissing necessary or even hugging, yet. Just rub your cheeky man-fur into the other dude's and the message is clear: we welcome you as you are; you may now proceed. Me and Jimbo are trying to have this technique patented. It works with Lesbians, too.

We ran into Clickboo and Dr. Jeff, again. Those boys are everywhere -- except on their blogs. I taught them the new greeting and they seemed to dig it, as their facial fur became erect like porcupine quills. Just be careful, though. My voracious greeting sometimes made Clickboo do this. So go easy at first rub.

I continue to be amazed at the wonderful friends and acquaintances that I am lucky enough to have in my life. I would say I'm blessed, but that would suggest a belief in God, and that she's up there, singling me out and sprinkling hairy dust all up on my behind. So I'll just say I'm fortunate. And to all of them, I give a cheeky fur rub. Please pay this new greeting forward. Start with your co-workers. But let's figure out a name first. Fur + Rub = Fub -- so maybe a cheeky fub? Hmm.