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May 29, 2009

The Most Amazing T-shirt Ever!

This 3-Wolf Moon T-shirt is currently THE #1 BEST-SELLING APPAREL on Amazon, largely because of its snarky customer reviews.

When did the Internet become so snarky? I blame the gays. And when did the word snarky become such a popular adjective to use? I had never even heard of it until a couple years ago. Again, I blame the gays for its overabundance in modern discourse. As of this posting there are 841 snarky reviews for this shirt. I swear I didn't write any of them! Really!

The small New Hampshire company that produces the shirt was blindsided by all the sudden purchases, selling around 1,000 a day. I repeat, it's THE #1 BEST-SELLING APPAREL on Amazon. The shirt also has its own Facebook page -- of course!

Interestingly, Amazon tells me that 'Customers Who Viewed This Item Also Viewed' the following:

The Amazon page for Joe the Plumber's book, in which he is "Fighting for the American Dream," is in itself a wonder to behold. The customer review tags include such (snarky!) gems as "american idiot," "bird cage liner," "i pitty the foo," "anti-welfare welfare recipient," and my favorite, "a good place to stash your weed."

Again, not me!

Anyway, I can't wait to wear my new shirt.

(Hat tip: Steve in TX)

Posted by durban bud at 11:45 AM | Comments (4)

May 28, 2009

Bromance

Forgive me for posting this BUT...it's kinda funny, and...cute.

Around the 1:20 mark, Adam describes his preferred sexual role. The look on Kris' face is priceless. He seems to know a lot!

You can tell these guys genuinely like each other. Check out the smiles at each other. Awwwwww.

Again, please forgive me.

Posted by durban bud at 9:31 PM | Comments (6)

May 27, 2009

Sprung

I've been escaping city life the majority of May's weekends courtesy of some amazing friends.

Earlier this month a kind bloke took me to his country home in Rappahannock, VA. I know, I hadn't heard of it either. But it was beautiful and oh so quiet. The only time I felt uncomfortable in that small town was when I was awoken at 3am by the Children of the Corn singing Ave Santini outside my bedroom window, holding signs saying "GET OUT!" and "YES on 8!" and "UPDATE YOUR DUMB BLOG!" Otherwise it was splendid.

We went fishing! It was incredibly relaxing for me. Not so much for the fish. If I were a fish I would have to be on Fish Paxil. It's so mean to stab them in the mouth and then pull them around by the wound. But someone once said, "It's okay to eat fish cuz they don't have any feelings." And I believe him.

The two of us went on our fishing expedition, along with a married heterosexual male, to a secluded pond on some ex-senator's massive property. Thanks for that, Mr. Senator! The heterosexual helped me unhook the only fish I caught. That was sweet. Super cool guy. If his right to marry the person he loves was put to a popular vote by a bunch of strangers, I would enthusiastically vote in support of extending him that basic decency. But that's just me!

I would like to fish more often. I always enjoyed it as a kid. Maybe I should start a gay fishing league. I would call it Gays Oddly Into Fish, or GOIF for short. We'll see.

Rob and I went to Rehoboth a couple weekends this month, most recently for the Memorial Day holiday. It was crazy crowded with homosexuals. At first I thought there might be a Peter Billingsley Look-a-Like Convention happening that weekend, but then realized, no, there were just a lot of lesbians in town.

I had a mellow time:

We stopped at Royal Farms for a bathroom break on the way there, and on the way back:

I found this lovely graffiti in the only bathroom stall:

And this:

It was still there the following weekend. Nice, Royal Farms.

Thanks to Ira & Jason, Tim & Donn, and Jimmy for letting me be your bitch for the weekend. Good times.

Posted by durban bud at 2:50 PM | Comments (7)

May 19, 2009

The Prophecy

Posted by durban bud at 2:58 PM | Comments (15)

May 12, 2009

Reminds Me Of Bear Happy Hour

Posted by durban bud at 10:48 AM | Comments (4)

May 7, 2009

Gone Fishin'

Posted by durban bud at 1:18 PM | Comments (18)

May 4, 2009

Sunshine in a Pill

I just had my first thorough physical examination by a doctor since I retired my title as The Amy Winehouse of Dupont Circle three years ago.

The good news: I am in excellent health.

The bad news: While I was standing as he examined my testicles, I found myself instinctively and suggestively rubbing my nipples like this. AWKWARD! I'm not kidding. Luckily I caught myself and stopped. Then I laughed at what I had just done, which also wasn't appropriate considering he was checking for cancer lumps.

The only minor issue he found after reviewing my blood work was a Vitamin D deficiency. I was like, "Fuck you, liar. I eat carrots. Lots of them. In fact I eat so many, Rob says I was most likely a rabbit in a past life. What's up (with that), Doc?" He said, "You may get a lot of Vitamin D from vegetables, fool. But you're missing the necessary Vitamin D largely dispensed to us from the sun."

"It's not my fault it's cloudy all the time lately. I've stood outside on my patio looking up at the sky and tried blowing really hard to get them to move, but they won't budge."

He assured me that a lot of his clients are suffering from the same deficiency lately, and that, he too, has the same problem. He put me on a prescription for Vitamin D. It's basically sunshine in a pill. Is there anything they can't put in a pill these days?!? They should totally make a pill with air-conditioning. Or maybe a pill to combat bad manners and diva complexes. That would be cool. I would hand them out to certain people I run into at gay functions.

I'm supposed to take one a week for two months. If I abused the pills and took four at one time, I wonder if I would get sunburn. Hmmm.

If that's the only health issue I've got these days, I'll gladly take on this minor vitamin disorder.

Posted by durban bud at 2:01 PM | Comments (16)